Daily Archives: August 9, 2011

Pre-emptive anxiety

I’m not your typical worrier. In fact, I rarely worry at all. I don’t really believe in it. It’s one of the upsides of my personality. I don’t often look far enough into the future to worry about anything, or stress about anything, or freak out about the unknown. I just kinda…I don’t know…live. I’m easy-breezy like that. Except?

Right now I’m kinda mildly freaking out below the surface of my calm exterior.

In less than two weeks I will be boarding a plane, with a toddler in tow, by myself and I will head to Michigan for 9 days of glorious reunions, weddings, hanging out with old friends, and meeting new ones.

I’m tickled pink about the reunions, weddings and fun part. I’m scared shitless about the traveling by myself with a toddler part. I’m kinda nervous about being a single parent for 9 days. And I don’t know how I’m going to make it being away from Brad for that long. We’ve never been apart for that long. The longest was 5 days, it happened 3 months into our relationship, and it was awful being away from him that long. Needless to say, I can sometimes feel my heart pounding when I stop to think about this trip.

I’m excited, don’t get me wrong. I’m really really really excited. I just don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to pack. I don’t know how to handle the airplane ride. What if she screams the entire time? What if she demands to crawl up and down the aisles? What if she wants to crawl through the airport? I don’t have enough hands for all the juggling that I’m going to have to do checking in and during our layover. What about the equipment needed to take care of a baby?

It’s completely common, over the last few weeks, for me to be going through my day and think, “I don’t think I’m going to pack diapers. I’m just going to bring enough for the day we’re traveling and then buy some at Target.” Or, “I can’t decide which stroller to bring, the mac-daddy one or the umbrella one. I need to text Elizabeth and see what she thinks”. These thoughts happen out of the blue, and they happen often. Do ya’ll know how completely uncharacteristic it is of me to think about anything weeks in advance? I mean, I literally just threw my daughters first birthday together in about a week and a half…and I knew that was coming for a whole year! Do you see what I’m saying?

I’m stressing myself out about this crap. It’s giving me gray hairs. I keep reminding myself that the traveling is only 1 day, and it’s not even 8 hours…and the whole trip is only 9 days. PLUS, I’m going for a pretty dadgum awesome reason, and we’re going to be fine. It’s going to be great. Zoe is going to be great on the airplane, and will probably be making friends with everybody like she’s apt to do. And besides, there’s always Benadryl…right? Just kidding! Mostly.

Anyways…basically this post is a cry for advice. Any and all advice. I could care less if you have ever traveled with a kid or not. If you have an idea…send it my way. Btw, I’m bringing our carseat and stroller on the plane with me and I’m borrowing a pack-n-play there. Also, I’m against leashes on children {although I’ve definitely considered it for the airport part}. Ok…advise away!

Happy Tuesday ya’ll!